And Then She Was 4
“Reach down and touch her head. Did your other three children have so much hair?”
We were nearing hour 12 of our first home birth. The birth of our fourth child, Emma.
Emma Leah Muhlenfeld was born November 7, 2014. She took her time winding her way out of my birth canal and into the water where she was greeted by the knowing hands of Nancy, the good “white witch” nurse practitioner midwife my husband referred to as Aslan.
So tired I was, but reaching down between my legs into the water to touch her full head of hair. It was time. I was ready to stop working and hold my baby.
David in clothes sitting behind me in the bathtub filled with blood, poop, and witch-blessed water, I gathered my strength and brought my final human into this messy world.
Where everyday I smother her with kisses and shower her with love from me, her mother and all the strong, brave women that came before her in our family. The spirits that helped usher her safely from one side of heaven to her fresh human journey of being anything she can imagine, create or dream.
Happy 4th birthday, Emma. I love you. Thank you for choosing me to be your mama.
Lotsa love,
Leah
Emma Leah coming into this world.
Movement is the key to life. It brings us into this world.
Movement fills us with energy and hope.
From physical childbirth to mental stress and anxiety, move. Moving your body moves your soul.
May we move through our suffering and pain to find light in all that we do and are becoming, childbirth and beyond.
Welcome to this family, Emma Leah.
You are loved.
p.s. It is taking me a lot of courage to place these sacred photos on the internet. But I scoured the interwebs researching and looking at other women hold bravery in their hearts and minds to trust their bodies and partners enough to forgo the traditional hospital birth for a more natural experience at home. Thus, I am paying it forward to those of you whom might be searching for the same. Thank you David for being an amazing partner in all four of our births - from hospital to home, so many experiences we share. YOU are my champion and biggest strength when the fire moments grasped me and I have to walk through to the other side of joy.
This was from Charlotte’s birth in 2013 - and when I sat down to write a Leah Love Notes post today, I knew I needed to share Emma’s birth. I give so much thanks to my strong body and mind. May I never take you for granted and pass my inner strength on to the women in my life and others searching for it.
Our joyous kitchen on 11/7/2018 after the “birthday fairy” visited and mama hit up Sugar Shack!!
p.s.s. Thank you mama in heaven for sharing your birth story with me, when I was young. I know you dreamed of having me at home, but things did not go as you planned. I honored your inner strength when bringing this sweet baby into the world and know you were there with us the whole time. I love and miss you every day. You are a constant source of inspiration and well of love I dig into and feast from to keep moving forward. I’d give anything to go on a walk with you and tell you all the stories of these crazy babies of mine, big and small, such miracles and balm for my soul. You are with us everyday.
